And perhaps, this is the conclusion...
As i said, i think i know the answer in my heart and my mind, and at the same time, i know what i want. But sadly, it seems like what i want and the outcome are different..
When dreams and reality are at war with each other... perhaps usually it's the reality that wins.. because the deciding power doesn't really lie in your hands...
Sometimes, i wish there was an easier solution, wish that things were easier, that i need not consider too many different factors and just make a decision. I wish that i don't have to always find myself standing at crossroads.. But then again, i guess if everything were that easy for me, if things need not any consideration, if i always had only one way to go, then i think i'll probably not end up where i am today.
I'll end up missing out on lots of stuff, and i won't be able to experience what life is like overseas, i may not get to know the people whom i've gotten to know over all these years..
Choices, decisions. They give you the freedom of choosing the next step, but at the same time, there are restrictions and many factors to consider. One decision leads to another, one step leads to the next and i can't say i'll just choose what i want and not care about what happens after.. Every decision made comes with consequences..
Sometimes, when your dreams and reality are at war with each other, what are you going to do? What's going to happen? Will you be happy with the outcome? I don't know to be honest...
I know eventually, something will work out in the end. I just don't know what yet. I think i have an answer in my heart and my mind. I think i know what i want.. But i don't know if what i want can become a reality..
I've got 2 more weeks to figure out this..
I guess sometimes, when making certain decisions, one will need to make certain sacrifices.. And therein lies the question.. Are the sacrifices made worthwhile?
To be honest, i don't know. I would like to think that the sacrifices made, or the sacrifices that i am going to make, are worthwhile. But sometimes, we can never be too sure till we get to it... isn't it?
But then again, for now, at this point in time, i do think that it will be worthwhile... :)
