I happened to chance upon this little note on facebook that was written by one of my facebook friends. This is just a excerpt from the note..

The Meaning of Friendship

When we talk about the meaning of friendship, some questions would come to our mind; How do we define friendship? Can a relationship be measured? How do we distinguish the level of relationship we have with different friends?

To me, a friendship is more than just of group of people sharing a common goal or interest in life. It is also more than just a group of people working/studying in the same place/organisation for a certain period of their time in life. A genuine friendship consists of a group of people sharing common principles and values in life. They are able to relate to one another in their deepest thoughts without any feelings of being judged upon because of their common values. They can share their thoughts freely because a common platform of understanding is established. Their genuine concern for one another can be felt upon without any use of words. Although we need friends in life, friendship should also never be seen as a means of eradicating loneliness. The basis of their friendship is not a "plus and minus equation"; it is not measured upon how beneficial/useful this person can be to the other party.

A genuine friendship takes into account the weakness and strength of an individual and accepting who he/she is. When we speak of accepting the person for who he/she is, we should be mindful that speaking the truth even when it hurts is part of showing genuine concern. Speaking the truth is not just about expressing how one party feels towards the other party's action. It comprises of sharing the reasons behind their feelings and actions and then aligning them with the common values and principles established. Most importantly, the basis of their discussion is built upon the trust and integrity of each parties. In fact, when we initiate measures to distrust or corrupt the integrity of the other parties, it only reveals the way we built upon this friendship with the other party.

When we seek to establish a genuine friendship with another party, we should bear in mind that a true test of friendship is one that endures through sufferings. As George Washington says. "True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation."

While reading this part of the note, i found myself nodding in agreement.. This is what i feel about friendships too. That as friends, and i mean, true friends, genuine ones, will be able to relate to one another in their deepest thoughts without the feelings of being judged upon..

Friendship and family are equally important to me. Family aside, the support that i get from my group of close friends is something that i cannot do without. Looking at the different friendships that i have with different people over these 20 years of my life... i've come to realise that as i grew older, i've become slightly clearer of myself and the friends that i have.

As i've quoted in one of my previous posts before "The depth of a friendship does not depend on the length of acquaintance." It's true. very true to me. It doesn't matter how long i've known my close friends.. speaking of which, i've come to notice one sort of a similarity among all of them. My group of close friends, to say the truth, i have not known them for long at all. Half a year, 4 years, 8 years.. and I always thought that best friends are friends who know each other for many many years. Seems like i'm pretty wrong about that.

I've heard this quote somewhere before.. "It is easy to find someone to share your joy with, but to find someone to share your sorrows with, it isn't easy." and like that quote in the note above, "a true test of friendship is one that endures through sufferings." How true indeed. I'm someone who usually wouldn't voice out my feelings when i'm upset, but some of my close friends, they just seemed to be so in tune with me. I can't hide anything from them, they just know when something is wrong.

I truly thank God for placing my group of close friends in my life, cos' i really don't know what i will do without them. It doesn't matter where i am, whether i am in Singapore or in Perth. God has placed my best and close friends in these 2 places...

I'm blessed, truly am.